Pet ownership in Canada has increased almost 20 per cent since 2020, with approximately 58 per cent of Canadians having a cat, dog, fish, bird or other animal at home. In 2022, 38% of Canadian households have a cat; 35% have a dog.
A few years ago, after a suitable period of mourning that followed the death of our beloved family dog, a Wheaten Terrier named Sunni, my kids decided they wanted a cat. Of course, they’d take care of him, so much so that their father and I wouldn’t even know he was there.
Their father and I are now the full-time caretakers of two cats.
Edgar is jet black with the pointy ears of a bat. He’s not beautiful but he’s a lover, with a heart of gold. He follows my husband around like a dog, even greeting him at the door, and thrives on routine. My husband’s office window must be opened before 9 a.m. for bird watching,he begs for meat or cheese beside the dinner table (100% my husband’s fault), Edgar’s eyes squinted to look passive and sweet, or on his back, pretending he’s a forlorn, starving otter.
Every night, Edgar insists it’s bedtime and herds us up the stairs, then snuggles into my husband’s side, does his nails (his own nails, not my husband’s – a pedi-pedi), and sleeps there all night. The next morning, he snuggles in for a morning cuddle and then happily begins his daily routine again.
Then there’s Angus. As my kids say, he’s the cattiest cat that ever catted. Arrogant, aloof, untouchable, divine. Angus is an orange ball of ego and attitude. He has the cleanest, fluffiest, softest fur (think orange chinchilla) and, despite the fact that he uses a litter box, he smells like a fine perfume: lightly floral, dewy, delicate.
That smell, that exquisite orange fur, that incredibly full, subtly striped, majestic tail…he draws you in. You must touch him. Hold him. But as you approach, no matter how gently, with your eyes lowered to show due respect, Angus sizes you up and quickly determines you are unworthy of his presence, much less to touch his perfect coat. So, he gives you the cold shoulder, swiftly but surely moving just out of reach, leaving you forlorn, alone, wanting.
Regardless of their contrasting personalities and pathologies, Edgar and Angus are both important members of my family and we love them both dearly.
While most of us don’t need convincing, there’s actually scientific evidence that having a pet can improve mental health and increase your sense of well-being. Losing a pet is, for many, like losing a close friend or family member.
Pets can help us to build patience and to calm frayed nerves. Several colleagues, who live alone, have shared that their pet helped them survive the pandemic and remain psychologically well.
One dear teammate told me she was having a hard week and when I inquired, she said, “You’re going to laugh at me,” and shared that her dog, who’d been part of her family for twenty years, had just died. She told me she was shocked she was taking it so hard.
Pets can help us to build patience and to calm frayed nerves. Several colleagues, who live alone, have shared that their pet helped them survive the pandemic and remain psychologically well.
One dear teammate told me she was having a hard week and when I inquired, she said, “You’re going to laugh at me,” and shared that her dog, who’d been part of her family for twenty years, had just died. She told me she was shocked she was taking it so hard.
I told her about my own grief when Sunni died, but also agreed that non-pet people don’t always understand how painful the loss of a pet can be.
Many people who own a pet consider them to be a member of their family, a beloved companion, even a friend. But for some of my patients, who have no one else, their pet is their greatest, closest, sometimes only friend. It was through them that I learned how terribly, enduringly painful the loss of a deeply loved pet can be.
Over the past several years, the world has endured a great deal of loss, and many of us have personally experienced loss, chronic uncertainty and emotional pain. The pain of loss is one of the most difficult life experiences, especially the loss of someone we love. Grief is the price we pay for love. However, most of us believe that love is worth it- I certainly do- because it’s one of the most enriching, sustaining aspects of life. And love takes many forms.
Wherever you find solace, whether from a partner, friends, workmates or pet, doesn’t matter. What’s important is forming and maintaining supportive emotional bonds, which is a powerful protector of mental health.
If the idea of spending time with and caring for a pet appeals to you, and you have the time, love and resources available to take good care of one, explore it. Pets can improve mental health, your outlook and compassion, which helps us be healthier and kinder to ourselves and each other.
If you’ve suffered the loss of a pet, please know that it’s normal to grieve. There are peer support groups that can be an incredible resource. Commonly, my patients who have lost a pet feel guilty for considering getting another one. I always tell them the same thing: our hearts have a huge capacity for love. While a new pet will definitely be different from the one who died, as different as Angus is from Edgar, you will love your new pet too and they will bring the same positive energy into your life. I haven’t been proven wrong yet.
This blog post is part of a series looking at the state of our mental healthcare system and ways we can create sustainable change to improve quality and outcomes for anyone impacted by mental illness.
Sue Paish, CEO changemaker in several health-related companies. Separate mental health and substance abuse. Improve access to coaching during pain management (vs. opioid-first-always). Change collective mindset among leaders. How to get things done.
“I think one of the challenges that mental health has always had is that it was pushed out of view. We always knew there was a crisis in mental health.” Dr. Alika Fontaine shares his ideas to stabilize the system and move things forward.
Some experiences are so profound they leave a lasting mark, shaping who we are and who we become. Our workplaces are the beneficiary of Stéphane’s experience in Rwanda and what happened after. His ideas on transforming workplace mental healthcare. Which of the 3 buckets of workplace mental health programs does your organization belong in?
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